Monday, January 31, 2011

Winter Apocalypse!!

Once again due to circumstances beyond my control, I do not have time to do a real post this week.

Looks like Boreas is looking to wipe this boring town off the map.

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Saturday News Roundup

Saturday is the last day in my work week, so you know it is a good day for me. There are a ton of things we’re going to briefly cover. Some news stories that broke this week, some reminders of what cool things are on TV this weekend, and a bit of Mass Effect news.

All-Star Weekend
Starting off with hockey news, the Superskills competition is this Saturday night at 7pm. The actual All-Star game is on Sunday at 4pm. Team Lidstrom and Team Staal drafted their players last night and you can see the full roster list here. While I love watching the Superskills competition, the All-Star game itself has been boring for a while. The new setup is pretty cool and has me interested again. Also the first big presentation of the Guardian Project is going to happen. Will it be awesome, terrible, or somewhere in between? So terrible it is awesome will also be accepted as a possible answer. Next week Brandon and I will start our reviews of each Guardian. Expect a Division a week.

Bane has been all over the news lately with the new Batman casting news. When written intelligently and not just as a mindless bruiser, Bane is my favorite Batman villain. I’m not sure exactly why I love him; it might be the luchador mask. Anyway, I had missed all the previews of the latest Young Justice cartoon so I had no idea he was going to be showing up. I was very happy the way they portrayed him. He was smart, manipulative, and strong. He was voiced by Danny Trejo. So freaking amazing.

There is lots more after the jump, check it out.

Friday, January 28, 2011

Flash Friday: Retro Review Part 1

A chance visit to the Toys R Us last night had me finding a peg filled with the newest wave of Retro-Action DC Super Heroes. Normally that area is filled with Retro-Action Lex Luthors and Sinestros; so I was pretty surprised to see they had ordered new stock. Now here is where this toy review is going to be a little different from the others I’ve done and why this is only Part 1. I haven’t opened them yet. Shock and horror, I know!

I normally champion the idea of releasing toys from their plastic prisons; the amazing packaging on these guys has stopped me though. Well at least slowed me down, will open them. A few details about the line before I get too far ahead of myself; this is the third series in the line of figures that are designed to resemble the old Mego “World’s Greatest Superheroes” figures that ran from 1972-1983. It isn’t just the figure design either; the packaging looks like it could have been pulled off the shelf in the 70s.

The front of the packaging has pictures of Flash, Captain Cold, Wonder Woman, and “Shazam”. Captain Marvel is a little strange here; not just because they used his catchphrase and not his name, I understand most non-comic readers identify him as Shazam. The big red cheese isn’t even in this line; he is in the fourth series. Cheetah is the other figure in the third series and she’s been left off the front.

The back of the packaging does make up for that at least. Cheetah is seen in an action shot as she squares off against Wonder Woman. Now there isn’t normally a blinding light coming from her crotch; that is just me forgetting to turn the flash off my camera. That would be one fucked up action feature to include in a toy though. Cheetah, now with light up crotch! Anyway, in the next month or so the quality of the toy pictures here should get better, I’m going to try to buy or rig up a light box. I’m not a photo person by any stretch of the imagination, so if you have advice for me in that regard, please drop it in the comments.

Back to the packaging! Not only does the design look like the figures I remember as a kid, they went so far as to weather the packaging. Seriously, look at that paint job. Was it water damage? Normal wear and tear? Such a simple thing, but it really impressed me. You could believe that this has been sitting in someone’s attic for years. It sucks that there is no way to free your figures without damaging such a cool package. They are coming out of the package, I just haven’t figured out how I’m going to do it. So next week Part 2 of the review will probably mention what I did and have some more pictures of the figures themselves. Come back next week and check them out!

Hey it’s the orange knight from Castle Crashers, what is he doing here? Kapow! If you enjoy seeing Action League Flash punch other toys, check out my other articles this week. There is a Kapow at the end of every one of them.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Beer List Thoughts

With my beer list behind me I have been thinking about the trip it was and the things I”ve learned about my own personal tastes in beer. Everyone’s tastes are different and I try to take that into account when I say that I like or dislike something. I knew going into this that I did not like IPAs. After having like 10 pale, IPA, or double IPAs; that fact is now more firmly entrenched then ever.

It was not all a bad thing though. If it wasn’t for the beer list I might have never tried Session Lager and Session Black. Those tiny little bottles got me through the last Star Wars Celebration; I had filled my backpack full of them. Sure I clanked a bit while walking around, but I was always refreshed. And I got to spend the day mistaking it for Red Stripe. It is rare when I don’t have one of the two Session beers in my fridge now.

Brooklyn Lager, Brooklyn Brown? I love you. Throw the Winter Ale in there too. I’m not picky, I want you all. Seriously, the other highlight to my list is the Brooklyn brewery. Every time I see a new type of beer from them that I haven’t tried, it is an instant buy. I’ve yet to be disappointed. In fact the bar just got in a Brooklyn Chocolate Stout and I had a glass of it last night. It was very nice.

These were not the only beers I liked, some of the other ales and stouts were quite tasty, but they were the ones that really stayed with me. I think more then anything though the list really helped me get out of my comfort zone and I’m willing to try just about any beer once. This picture sucks, but my camera phone has no flash and the bar is dark.  The mug says Ken.O!

Since the beer list was a kind of journey, I’m looking to take another booze journey. I’m thinking of putting together a group to go “Drinking Around the World” over at Epcot. If you are in the area and want to go with me, leave a comment or drop me an email. I’m thinking late February (maybe the 26th). The entire trip will be documented for a Hangover Thursday. You’d have to supply your own ticket and buy your own booze; F’ing Monkey doesn’t have an expense account or anything.

Hey Domo....Kapow!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Playing for Change, Peace through Music

I’m going to take the site off the rails here for a moment. For a website that’s mantra is Comics, Games, Booze I sneak in a lot of articles about music. My secret shame is how utterly inept it comes to playing music. I’ve got no rhythm. Regardless of that, music is very important to me. I watched a documentary last night called Playing for Change; I’d be lying if I didn’t say it moved me.

It started with Producer Mark Johnson. He was in a subway one day and two Monks were playing guitar and singing. It was one of those amazing moments where everyone stopped, listened, and shared the experience. That music connected people regardless of race, religion, or social class was the driving force. So Mark Johnson and Enzo Buono began traveling the world with cameras and recording equipment. 100 musicians and ten years, we have Playing for Change.

Recording vocals and instruments through separate channels they were able to take musicians from all over the world and have them contribute to the same song. “Stand by Me” is the one they are most famous for. Most of the artists are street performers and the recording took them to areas that had been devastated by poverty or natural disasters. In South Africa they asked one of the performers how they could help; he told them they needed a music school. And so the Playing for Change non-profit organization was created.

So now there is a documentary, CDs, tours, and a charity behind this. As of this writing, The Playing for Change charity has paid for 7 music programs, 600 students, and 130 jobs. On their website you can pick up the CD and the documentary bundled together, I highly recommend it. They come sepereately too, but if you're going to pick it up you will want both.  You can also go to the charity’s website and donate or find other ways to get involved with the group.

I’ve spent a lot of time telling you if it was worth it to drop 10, 20, or 60+ bucks on toys and books. Now I’m telling you donations at the Playing for Change Foundation start at 5 dollars go up from there.

Okay, back to my normal nonsense….Kapow!!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Exclusive Dragon Age 2 DLC? Morrigan Disapproves -10

Get ready for the blood splatter, today is going to be Dragon Age centric. We’ll start out with some downloadable content talk and then after the jump there will be a review of one of the new action figures that just hit the stores. Today the downloadable extras got another item to add to the list. Buy a copy of Dead Space 2; get a set of armor for Dragon Age 2 based on Dead Space’s Isaac. It looks like a pretty cool set of armor but I haven’t gotten into Dead Space so that will probably be the first of the extras I miss out on. Some of the add-ons are no longer available and some won’t be available until the Facebook game starts up.

 Here is a run down of the items announced so far.

  • Hindsight, a belt you can sign up for on the Dragon Age 2 website
  • Staff of Parthalan, you had to sign up for the news letter
  • Sebastian Vael, character included in the Signature Edition
  • Apostate’s Courage, staff included in the Signature Edition
  • Seeker’s Bulwark, shield included in the Signature Edition
  • Adder of Aniva, bow included in the Signature Edition
  • Might of Sten, sword included in the Signature Edition
  • The Irons, belt include in pre-orders placed through the EA Store
  • Fadeshear Sword, sword included in any pre-order
  • Lion of Orlais Shield, shield included in any pre-order
  • The Black Emporium, a store, summon-able mabari hound, a appearance changing mirror included in every new game
  • Air of Confidence, ring obtained through playing Dragon Age Legends on Facebook
  • Dura’s Blue Flame, amulet obtained through playing Dragon Age Legends on Facebook
  • Evra’s Might, ring obtained through playing Dragon Age Legends on Facebook
  • Evra’s Trophy Belt, obtained through playing Dragon Age Legends on Facebook
  • Ivo Family Crest, amulet obtained through playing Dragon Age Legends on Facebook

 Holy crap that is a lot of stuff! Anyway, we’re only getting started. Follow the jump for the toy review.


Monday, January 24, 2011

Why must RL intrude?

Sorry folks, but because I am ridiculously busy at work today this is the only post that is going up. Next week I will be back to discuss Warhammer 40k.

Stay Tuned.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Getting to know That F'ing Monkey

While looking over site stats the other day I made the happy realization that more and more people are coming to the site.  Obviously that’s the point; if I just wanted to talk to myself I wouldn’t need to put things on the internet.  But what I meant was, when the site started 99% of the readers were people who knew me in real life.  I’m thrilled that it is changing, so I figured Brandon and I could share a little bit more about our likes when it comes to the F’ing Monkey mantra of Comics, Games, and Booze.  Some of the answers will be obvious to readers here, but one or two of Brandon’s answers surprised me.  As per the usual, I’m in grey and Brandon is in Green.

Comics, Games, Booze the Ken O version

Favorite Flash: Walter West

Favorite Green Lantern: Guy Gardner

What Comics are you picking up every month: Flash, Mouse Guard. Everything else is trades.

How many long boxes do you have: I purged almost all my long boxes.  I have 1 and 1 giant file cabinet from Comic Cubes

Favorite Star Wars Film: RotJ. Based solely on how much I love the star fighter battle at the end.

Favorite Indiana Jones Film: Temple of Doom, Short Round is the bestest.

Five other favorite movies (Jaws is a given, pick 5 more): Warriors, Big Sleep, She Wore a Yellow Ribbon, American Werewolf in London, Commitments

Five songs you could not do without: Barroom Hero-Dropkick Murphys, 99 Red Balloons-love the original german version but going with 7 Seconds, Sick Boys -Social Distortion, Highway Patrolman-the Johnny Cash version, Young Crazed Peeling-the Distillers

Favorite Muppet: Animal.  I love some Oscar the Grouch, but Animal wins.

Favorite Hockey Team: Detroit Red Wings

Five favorite video games: Mass Effect (All), Rock Band (All), Suikoden (I & II), Def Jam Fight for New York, Bully

What game are you playing now: Mass Effect 2, Your Shape Fitness, Rock Band 3 (trying keyboards), Plants vs Zombies

Favorite D&D Setting: Dark Sun

Do you have a favorite set of Dice: Tiny dice made of obsidian

Five drinks you’d order at the bar: Guinness, Black and Tan, carbomb, Brooklyn Brown, Session Black

The drink you avoid like the plague: Babuni Peach

Comics, Games, Booze the Brandon version 

Favorite Flash: Barry Allen

Favorite Green Lantern: Hal Jordan

What Comics are you picking up every month: All 3 Lantern books, Booster Gold, BPRD / Hellboy,

How many long boxes do you have: Currently 3

Favorite Star Wars Film: Empire Strikes Back

Favorite Indiana Jones Film: Raiders of the Lost Ark

Five other favorite movies (Jaws is a given, pick 5 more): Ghostbusters, Alien, Casablanca, The Sting, Shaun of the Dead

Five songs you could not do without: White Room - Cream, Come Together - The Beatles, What's Left of the Flag - Flogging Molly, Thunder Kiss '65 - White Zombie, Baba O'Riley - The Who

Favorite Muppet: Gots to cheat on this one because they come in a pair - Waldorf and Statler

Favorite Hockey Team: Tampa Bay Lightning

Five favorite video games: Castlevania, Metroid, Batman: Arkham Asylum, Metal Gear Solid (the first one), Final Fantasy III

What game are you playing now: Spider-Man: Shattered Dimensions

Favorite D&D Setting: Dragonlance

Do you have a favorite set of Dice: What self-respecting nerd doesn't? Mine are green with a D20 that rolled 4 natural 20's in a row, killing 2 big bad "boss" monsters instantly (pissing off the DM right quick)

Five drinks you’d order at the bar: Guinness, Black and Tan, Scotch, Car Bomb, Dirty Martini

The drink you avoid like the plague: anything with Bud on the label

Friday, January 21, 2011

Flash Friday: Flashpoint Speculation

Well DC has stolen my oh so clever use of alliteration and started their own Flashpoint Fridays. That doesn’t mean anything is changing over here though. We’re still going to be doing Flash Fridays as long as my collection/wallet can stands it!

Since I already mentioned it, I should fill in those of you who haven’t heard about it already. Flashpoint is going to be the big Flash event that starts in May. The teasers that DC is throwing out make it look like history is a changing and it is going to affect all of their big guns. Obviously there will be lots of Zoom and Barry involved. There better be some big character moments for Jay, Wally, and Bart too. I’m shaking my fist menacingly in your direction DC. But considering the reality warping affects of the series there could be even more Flash family involvement then just the JWB.

Check out the possibilities after the jump…

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Hangover Thursday: The Text

I was going to be a good, responsible little monkey last night. I didn’t drink on an empty stomach. I cleaned up at trivia, scoring three free beers. I was even going to hit the road at 11. Then I got the text. “You still at the bar?” Now it is possible to reply back that you’re just about to leave, but I’ve never been able to do that. I get to drinking and I like to talk. I’ll wait around if there are new people coming to talk to. So the hangover is definitely here this morning, but it is nothing compared to last week’s brain aneurism.

The good news is I get my bar glass next week. They were getting them etched last night so it will be waiting for me. Expect my thoughts on completing my beer list next week with a picture of my prize. Instead of going over that today, we can talk about random booze news!

It is all over the news, so I’m a little late to the party on this one but Scottish Spirits Ltd. is selling Whisky in a Can. No joke, each can contains eight shots worth of whisky. You can’t buy it in the US so don’t go running to the liquor store just yet. But Scottish Spirits didn’t stop at Whisky in a Can, oh there is something far crazier that I haven’t seen any other media outlet reporting on. They make something called Arkay; it’s an alcohol free whisky. The website says it is for Muslims. Um…yeah moving on.

There was a study at Thomas Jefferson University in Philadelphia to determine the best way to cure a hang over. Using ethanol Professor Michael Oshinsky gave rats headaches. He then tested numerous cures on them, finally coming to the conclusion that coffee and an aspirin are the best cure. These rats only had headaches though; it isn’t like they were throwing up in the bushes.

Walt Disney World is doing a giant make over to their Fantasy Land area. Included in that is what is described as a small eatery named Gaston’s Tavern. You’re missing the boat Disney. No one cares about Gaston, we want the Snuggly Duckling!! Best location in a Disney movie ever.  And actually serve beer! Beer and cupcakes.  It would be awesome.  A nice cold one would help all those heat exhausted tourists.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Mega Python vs. Gatoroid

January 29th people; set your DVRs because Syfy has done it again. Way back in September the horribly spelled network gave unto us Sharktopus and it was good. Okay, okay, it was eye bleedingly horrible and wonderful all at the same time. I’ve watched it a few times since. Anyway, January 29th (same night as the NHL All-Star skills competition) they are premiering the movie Mega Python vs. Gatoroid.

Made by the Asylum film studio (best known for “mockbusters” like Snakes on a Train and Transmorphers) the plot to this one is like being hit in the back of the head with a ball peen hammer. A crazed animal rights activist is stealing illegally imported exotic snakes and then to free them from captivity, releases them in the Everglades. A park ranger, seeing these invasive species growing to giant proportions injects alligators with steroids so they have a fighting chance. To quote Kelly Bundy, “the mind wobbles.” Oh yeah, did I mention that the activist is played by Debbie Gibson and the ranger is Tiffany?

Yes, that Debbie Gibson and Tiffany. Neither are strangers to Asylum movies; Tiffany had been in Mega Piranha and Debbie had been in Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus. As you can imagine the cat fight between these two is getting more press then the rest of the movie. I’m excited about it and I really don’t know much about either of them. I think I could name one song each of them did and that might not be correct.  I know in 95 Debbie sang background vocals on the Circle Jerks song “I wanna destroy you.” But during the time they were around I was more infatuated with Lita Ford and Christina Applegate.

So while SyFy is hyping up the cheesecake and nostalgia factor of these two 80’s ladies, I’m more amazed by the plot. Escaped exotics are a real issue down here in Florida. While there have been those people who release their snakes/lizards into the wild when they get too big; a large portion of the invasive population is blamed on when Hurricane Andrew destroyed southern Florida in 1992. A large number of pet stores and exotic animal warehouses were included in that destruction. Snakes are very good escape artists. So that is why the Everglades are overrun with species like the Burmese Python.

The problem is so serious that Florida has started listing species as Conditional Reptiles. That means if you already own one, you can keep it until it passes away, as long as you keep a license for it. If you don’t already own an animal on the Conditional list, you aren’t getting it legally in Florida. Burmese, reticulated, North African, South African, amethystine, and scrub pythons are all on this list. So are green anacondas and Nile monitors. You can also get a permit to hunt pythons. Hmm… I took an odd turn while writing this. Probably because I love these reptiles; I want them to live healthy lives in their own environments so that all the Florida reptiles can live happily here in theirs. Regardless of the real life issues, on the 29th I’ll be watching some mega pythons, gatoroids, and cake wrestling. Oh yeah, and Mickey Dolenz.  He's in the movie playing as himself.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

X-Men Destiny: The First Disappointment?

When X-Men Destiny was first teased in October I said this game has the opportunity to become one of my all time favorites, or to break my heart. Silicon Knights has been keeping the details pretty tight to their chest up until now. Two Destiny related things happened this weekend. Official X-Box magazine came out with some details about the game and a youtube clip hit the net showcasing one of the characters (which was very quickly pulled). I’ve seen lots of comments about the character design, but the strange thing is this character isn’t new, we saw him in the teaser trailer that came out months ago.

The character in question Adrian Luca is seen sporting kneepads, tribal arm tattoos, and what looks like a camelbak. Obviously, this is a hero who is serious about hydration. The game starts at a demonstration that turns violent and as a player you then have to pick from three characters/backgrounds. Luca is the son of one of the Purifiers. With the last name Luca, we can guess he won’t be one of the big leader’s kids; otherwise he’d be Stryker or Risman. So the son of a mutant hater gains mutant powers, not a bad start.

You then pick from three power sets. Energy Projection is the one in the screen shots. Apparently there is a matter manipulation/body mass manipulation power set also. The third power set is still unrevealed. As the game goes on you level up your powers, pick up new abilities, and choose who you side with. From the description the big choice will be siding with X-Men or Magneto’s army. X-Genes will also help customize your powers, giving you aspects of the mutant they are taken from. The magazine gives the example that Surge’s X-Gene make Luca’s projection power crackle with blue electricity.

For the record I’m ok that you have to pick from three backgrounds. Think of them like the origin choices in the first Dragon Age. And I like the idea of being the son of a Purifier; so the first background is pretty cool. I’m worried about the look of the characters. It has already been announced that these characters are going to become part of Marvel Comics cannon. So we have a game based on making choices but the appearance of the three characters is locked? I really, really hope this is not the case. If you’re going to let me choose the powers and “destiny” of my character; please let me design what he looks like too.

Now we don’t know for sure that the look of the characters is predetermined. Maybe the pictures we’ve seen is just a default. Maybe you can customize them to your heart’s content. I hope that is the case. I am a fool for character creation. I’ve restarted games like Mass Effect two hours in because I wanted to change up the face I had created. It is one of the reason I love wrestling video games even though I haven’t watched a single wrestling match in years. With them saying that the characters are going to be official members of the Marvel universe though, I don’t think that we’ll get to change their look very much. When I hear more, you’ll see it here.

As a side note, most of the game information did come from OXM. I would not normally repost information like that but this weekend I saw this issue sitting on a bookstand. Across the very top was Mass Effect 3. I had a moment of weakness. OXM comes with a disc, so it was bagged. I couldn’t just open it and see what news they had on the game. It was a page of what OXM would like to see in ME3 and what they were afraid of seeing. Yeah. Not the smartest use of my 10 dollars. So after that bait and switch, I have no problem giving you the low down on X-Men Destiny.

Monday, January 17, 2011

3D...or F You Bit Torrent!

This weekend I saw the "Green Hornet" flick, not terrible, not good, but fun as hell. This is not a review of that film, this is going to be a rant against the scourge that is 3D.

To start with I am going to say that some 3D is not too bad. If the movie was filmed in 3D and it kinda makes sense for the story then I am fine with it (I am looking at you Tron: Legacy). As much as I hated "Avatar" as a movie I have to admit that the 3D was pretty. This is more about the shit that is post-converted 3D.

They say that fads tend to be cyclical, and 3D looks to be no different. It was big in the 50's as a gimmick to get your ass in the seat and it is a gimmick in the 2000's for exactly the same reason. It is a way to inflate ticket prices (by as much as five fucking dollars!) and make the box office returns higher. Fine, everybody has to make money on morons for that is the way of fads. More power to ya, Studios. But I am not going to pay it, I am going to "vote with my wallet" as they say. I brought up the "Green Hornet" earlier because I had to search out a theater in my area that had a non 3D showing. I drove out of my way to see it in good ol' two dimensions.

Yes I am sure that with gas prices what they are, driving 20 miles for a movie did not save the $3.50 that the theater 2 miles away up-charges for 3D. On the other hand Fuck You local theater. I will be doing the same for "Thor" and any other damn movie that has been post converted. Come on theaters, if you are going to have the 3D version at least have a few showings of the 2D as well.

The post conversion process brings down the lighting and brightness of film because it has to go through a couple of different generations. Therefore it makes everything darker, then they have to digitally brighten everything which further degrades the picture. So you are not seeing what the director of photography did on set while filming. Just look at "The Last Airbender" or "Clash of the Titans", reports indicated that you could not see any detail and that it was incredibly hard to see the action. (Quick disclaimer: That F'ing Monkey does not condone watching either of those movies...ever. Watch the 1981 version of Titans and the excellent Avatar: The Last Airbender cartoon. You have been warned)

As 3D becomes more and more of a money maker more Studios are going to insist on using the format for every damn thing. It is going to start looking like an SCTV sketch all the time.

So in the end Fuck You 3D, Fuck You right in the ass!

What do you think? Do you think I should get the fuck off the ol' high horse and suck it up? Let us know in the comments. Participate and be a friend of the Monkey!

Saturday, January 15, 2011

F'ing Monkey Archer Field Guide Volume 1: DC Edition

Back in October I posted 2 Flash Field guides.  At that time I had promised there would be more Field Guides.  Months past without any type of Field Guide showing up,even though I had notes for a number of them.  Finally, we have returned with the first volume of the Archer Field Guide.  The sheer number of DC archers demanded it have its own guide.  The next one will cover Marvel and the other comics companies.  It isn't ready yet, but I promise the next one won't take months to publish.

Also, I find the following Venn Diagram funny for no good reason, but it fits with today's theme.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Giant Sized Flash Friday: Tiny Toy Review

Happy Flash Friday everyone, I’m very happy to announce that I have a lot to talk about today. This week I received a box of three Flash related items. I was going to spread the reviews out to next week also, but when I started taking pictures I figured I’d just combine all of them into one Giant Sized Flash Friday Tiny Toy Review! Today I’ll be talking about The Flash and Professor Zoom Blammoids and the Flash/Boomerang Action League two pack. This should come as no surprise to anyone, but the rest of the article is going to be pretty image intensive, check it all out after the jump.

Follow the jump for the reviews.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Hangover Thursday: This is the end...

Gouden Carolus and Gouden Draak are the last two beers on my list. Both just under a liter, both about 15 bucks. The list is finished.  I’m not going to lie, I’m hurt. Like, thinking of going home and crawling back into bed hurt.

But was it worth it? Oh yeah.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Hard Times and Nursery Rhymes

This may be the most time sensitive news post I’ve every made on this site. So if you aren’t reading it on 1/12/11 it isn’t going to do you much good unfortunately. You may know Social Distortion has a new album coming out on the 18th of this month. If you didn’t, it is tilted Hard Times and Nursery Rhymes. In early December they made their first television appearance ever on the Jimmy Kimmel show and played the new song “Machine Gun Blues.” They must have liked TV; on the day of the album’s release they’ll be playing the Conan O’Brien show.

Now the big, time sensitive news: Today and today only, the entire album is streaming at That’s right, you can hear the entire album in advance. The more it streams today, the lower the price on Amazon will be on the release date too. Sure, I realize this is a promotional gimmick, but I’ll never complain about being able to listen to a full album before it’s released. Especially when it is an album I would have picked up on launch day anyway.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Tales from the Brain Jar, #11

You hear that whispering from the shadows again. That blur of motion at the corner of your eye. The soft scratching sound you only hear when you close your eyes. Fear not, it’s only…Tales from the Brain Jar! And not just any Tales from the Brain Jar either, issue 11 happens to be the longest of the tales to date. It is a tale of ghosts, zombies, and dead girls. So check it out after the jump.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Random Thought Download

Today is just going to be some random thoughts from the week past. Enjoy my random nonsense...

First you may see that the "Guest Blog by the Cake Fucker" picture is not here today. I have decided not to use it because Monday's are not really a guest blog anymore. It will still be around if I post any other time during the week, just to let you know that it is me. Of course you can also tell that it is me by the distinctive green text.

Ever since I got an IPod I have been getting more and more addicted to podcasts. If you like the humor of Kevin Smith check out the Smodcast Network, some of my favorites are original flavor Smodcast with Kevin and his long time producer Scott Mosier, Tell 'Em Steve Dave which is just random crap from Walt Flanagan and Bryan Johnson, Bagged and Boarded a comic podcast, and Puck Nuts a hockey (mostly the Devils) cast with Walt and Bryan. For a less comedic take on Hockey I am loving the Puck Podcast. For a monthly dose of good comic book chat check out Around Comics. For random nerd talk with a sexy bent listen to our friends at DeviantCast . I have yet to find a good booze cast, so if you know one let me know in the comments.

Last week in Lightning Hockey was a very painful one. It was crazy painful to watch the Bolts fall to the Penguins 8-1 in a sad, sad game that saw Tampa down 5-0 in the first ten minutes of the first. After a pretty weak win in Ottawa, they fell again to the Devils 6-3. The fucking Devils! They are the worst team in the league right now. After that shitty week the Bolts still hold a tenuous hold on the Southwest division with 2 points over the Capitals.

Also they released the first of the NHL Guardians -the Pittsburgh Penguin and the LA King. They are interesting to say the least. For some reason the Penguin has "Super Maneuverability" which seems like a strange power. The King however fits with LA by having a "Seismic Sword" so that is kinda cool. Of course as I was looking for the pics of those guys I found that they have a bunch of the other teams released as well so check those blogs on those links...

Saturday, January 8, 2011

X:Men the Intervention.

Hey Marvel, can you come in here for a moment?

Awesome, have a seat. We really need to have a talk.

Yes I’m still mad about the Thor: Mighty Avenger, but that isn’t what I want to talk about.

What Deadpool? Yeah, I know you can quit when ever you want. That isn’t why I wanted to talk to you.

It’s about Hank. Dr. McCoy. Yes, the Beast. The big blue guy.

Remember when you turned him into a fucking cat? Well, you know it has been like 10 years now, I think it’s time to fix this shit. Go with the original or go with the classic blue fuzzy, I don’t care which but this cat thing just needs to stop. I figured it was just a faze like when Superman went blue for a little bit, or when Daredevil started getting armored. You’d get tired of the cat thing and we’d all be back to where we started from. But you haven’t stopped. So I had to call you out. Please Marvel, drop the cat look. Publish all the Deadpool glut you want, but give us back the real Beast.

Just look at him!  He doesn't want to be a cat anymore.  Don't make the Beast cry.

Friday, January 7, 2011

Flash Friday: Reverse Flash Friday

Last week the new issue of the Flash came out, where the issue before it retold Captain Boomerang’s origin, this one retells the origin of Eobard Thrawne, Professor Zoom. We are going to take a look at that origin today, so it is more of a Reverse Flash Friday. Getting started, Professor Zoom first shows up in issue 139. Oh, did you think we’d be going over the new issue? I actually haven’t gotten to my local shop yet to pick it up yet.

As I was saying, Flash issue 139 opens with Dr. Drake’s creation, a “Time Satellite.” It is pretty much a time capsule without all that waiting. Close the door, push a button, and it is instantly on its way to the 25th Century. While the Time Satellite is filled with things from the present, the two important items are an atomic clock and one of the Flash’s suits. Dr. Drake is upset because after he sends the Time Satellite through time, he is worried that the atomic clock will become an atomic bomb! Ha ha, take that future!

The Time Satellite appears and instead of being afraid of something just appearing out of thin air, the future people decide to loot the time capsule. A man named Eobard Thrawne steals the Flash costume and concludes that using 25th century science he can manipulate the suit into providing the same super speed that the Flash had. As long as the suit is, “close to my body.” Creepy. That sounds so stalkerish. Do you think he smelled the suit? Sniffed the crotch? I bet he did.

Because of Thrawne’s scientific leanings both crooks and cops had called him “The Professor,” so he decides to call himself Professor Zoom. Now super powered, the not so good Professor decides to begin stealing Cribi sculptures. Because we don’t live in the 25th century we don’t know what those are, but the editors throw us a bone and explain, “It is necessary to interject here that in the year 2418 explorers from Earth landed on the strange world of Cribi. The earthmen found almost nothing whatever on the lone planet except certain striking metal sculptures. It was subsequently discovered that the metal of the sculptures would not tarnish, that it could not be dented or even analyzed! The sculptures were taken back to Earth where the mystery about them grew as their fame spread!”

The Flash shows up in the future thanks to Cosmic Treadmill and sees the contents of the Time Satellite on display. Of course we know his costume is missing, but so is the atomic clock. Flash also sees a newspaper with Professor Zoom on the cover. Flash and Zoom soon meet but the Professor is able to escape because he added “twin portable electro-rockets” to his suit to give him a boost of acceleration. Flash tracks him down by following his speed vibrations and they fight again. Finally Barry realizes that since Thrawne’s speed is manufactured so is his protection from the air friction. In a fairly brutal tactic Barry runs fast enough to burn off Zoom’s protective coating until he gives up.

We aren’t done yet though, there is still an atomic bomb about to explode! Flash finds it in the home of an elderly woman where she is just staring at it like it’s a television. Which to me is the best part of the issue, this old lady stole the atomic clock. Flash races in, grabs the clock, and leaves all so fast that to her it looks like the clock just disappears. Flash drops the bomb off in the Arctic Circle and lets it explode there, sorry polar bears. Then he returns home thinking he’ll never have to face the Reverse Flash again. Of course he does, it only takes till issue 147 before he shows up again.

Reverse Flash extra #1. When Thrawne appears his lightning bolt faces the same way as Barry’s. That makes sense considering it is the same suit just dyed a different color. When Hunter Zolomon became Zoom his lighting bolt faced the opposite direction. But ever since Thrawne showed back up in Rebirth he has been wearing the reversed lighting symbol also. Has anyone seen any reasoning behind this one?

Reverse Flash extra #2. Andy Price, asking the really important question.  I don't own this card, I found it online.  I really wished it was mine though.  So very awesome.
And with that, Reverse Flash Friday comes to an end. I should have a couple little things to talk about next week if my order arrives in time. See you then.


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